How Do You Know Your Relationship Is Over?

I have seen the same cycles with my clients over and over again when it comes to ending relationships. So many people say they wish they got out of relationships sooner, but it’s hard when you have invested so much time and money into it. If you are wondering whether or not your relationship is at it’s end – I’ve put together some signs that your relationship is ending. If you have all these signs, it’s better to end it as soon as possible so you don’t waste any MORE time.

1. The Sex Is Becoming Non-Existent

I’ve said before that waning sex drives are normal in any relationship, but if it’s drastically changed and you don’t even really feel the urge to touch them anymore – it’s a bad sign. Sex is an important part of any relationship, it bonds you. It’s something you do with them that you don’t do with anyone else on the planet (well….definitely shouldnt be!)

2. You Gut Is Telling You Something Isn’t Right

I am a big believer in intuition. If your gut is telling you something has changed and it’s different, it probably is. If he/she is acting shady, something is up. The only downside to this argument is that if you have been hurt before and you’re suspicious of everything – you could just think anything and everything feels wrong even when it’s not. Try to discern whether you are genuinely feeling that way or if it’s your past demons coming back to bite you

3. You Can Only See Flaws, Not Positives

When you can no longer see anything positive about your partner or your relationship, it’s time to throw in the towel. Couples that are snarky and negative about each other have both given up. If you really struggle to point out anything you love about your partner anymore, why are you still in it?

4. They Don’t Kiss You Properly

If your partner never pashes you anymore and instead gives you lame little grandma pecks – that is a sign that the passion has gone. I am not okay with grandma pecks in my relationship all the time. I need at least one good snog a day, if you aren’t kissing me with passion, I know something is up!

5. You Start Spending More Time With Friends and Family

This is a definite sign that either one of you is checking out. If you are spending more time with friends and family than ever before and putting more energy into those social and support circles, it means you’re ready to leave and/or avoiding being at home with them. I almost always see this with couples that divorce or break up soon after. (Let me just add that it is very healthy to have other social relationships and to nurture those, but when it’s all the time and a lot more than it used to be, it’s another sign)

Leaving a relationship, especially a long-term one or marriage, takes a lot of emotional energy. It’s normal to not want to deal with it or put it off. It’s better to bite the bullet and leave as soon as possible if there’s nowhere for the relationship to go. If you’re not excited about the future together and making plans, if you’re not going on dates anymore or you avoid going home – it’s over already.

Bethany x

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