How To Make A Long-Distance Relationship Work?

If there’s one thing I do know about, it’s how to make a long distance relationship work! My partner is from NZL, and we actually met online and started dating while we were living in different countries.

We spoke almost every single day on the phone for months, flying back and forth when we could. It was sustainable enough, but we did have a lot of teething issues. It was sad and lonely at times, but in ways it was better, because instead of spending those early months ripping each others’ clothes off, we had to bond through our minds and really get to know each other intimately. I think this is a big reason we are so strong today. We have an awesome friendship base, he’s my best friend and knows me better than anyone.

  1. See It As A Test

If you guys can last months or years away from each other, you can be sure as hell you can last together. Being long distance means that you have your life partner, but also have the space to become the best person you can be until you guys are reunited again. You have that space that’s not filled with trying to go out and date or look for a partner and can concentrate on being with yourself. After all you have to love yourself and love your own company before you can love anyone else properly.

2. Make Time To Do Things Together

Technology is a wonderful thing. You can watch movies together, video call a picnic, play online games together or even just take them to do something mundane, like take them shopping with you (JD used to do this with me all the time). It helps you to feel connected. Even though they aren’t there in person, it kinda feels like they are.

3. Get Creative With Your Sexy Time

We had imaginary sex a lot before we actually did it in person, and it was really exciting mentally preparing, thinking of new ways to do it and different things to wear. You can video call or just use your voice (video is better, depending on how shy you are haha). It uses all of your imagination and creativity, and it’s fun! You get to know your partners body, where they like to be touched and what their fantasies are. You can even buy toys that are app controlled, so he can control what’s happening to you from the other side of the world if he wants to. The brain is the biggest sex organ, so it can be just as fulfilling for both of you.

3. Have A Goal

Having a goal for your lives together is really important. How long are you going to be apart? Who will move where and why? You need some kind of motivation to continue the relationship, which lets face it, is a HUGE effort if it’s not going anywhere.

4. Stay Honest With Each Other

Don’t try and deal with feelings of jealousy, loneliness or insecurity alone. You have to be brutally honest and open with each other about what’s going on and what you’re feeling, or it will slowly tear you apart from the inside.

5. Stay Positive

There’s no point moping around about how much you miss each other. That won’t achieve anything. Instead, talk about your future and get excited about it. Plan your next trip together and laugh a lot.

Being in a long-distance relationship has it’s ups and downs, but with effort from both parties it can definitely work. Trust and communication are even more important in this case, so make sure you are open and don’t bottle things up.

Bethany x

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