Is He That Bad? Or Is The Grass Just Greener?

It’s become common place now that people don’t appreciate what they have, especially when it comes to relationships. Why would people try to make something that becomes a little bit hard better again, when they can just jump online and find someone else who is easier?

The truth is, good relationships – long lasting relationships – are hard work. You are never going to find a couple who is 100% happy all of the time. The thing is, couples that do work long term do so, because they are best friends that don’t even contemplate giving up on each other. They work through problems like it’s BOTH OF THEM against the problem, not them against each other.

As you know I am an advocate for women when it comes to domestic violence of any kind, being through it all before myself. So if your partner is physically or emotionally abusing you in any way, get out.

There are times though, when people are just bored of what they have or aren’t receiving the attention they think they deserve, and so other people start looking ‘better’ than their partner. They wonder if they should get out of the relationship, or daydream how much better it would be with someone else.

If you are one of these people I’m sorry to say – you are sorely mistaken. If you have yourself a man (or woman) who is treating you well, but the passion has just died or you feel like you’re just ‘different people’ now, I ask you to reconsider.

Before you throw in the towel, try and consider these things:

  1. Intimacy and Attraction Ebbs and Flows

People do change over the years, physically and mentally. Instead of being bored with the person you have try and think of new things about them that attract you to them. It’s normal to not appreciate what you have, but I assure you if you had some time away from them – months even – you may view them in an entirely different light.

2. Do you really want to start from the beginning with someone new?

Trying to find a new relationship with someone new and ditching your old one just because it’s boring is just like selling an old house and buying a new one instead of renovating the one you have. With the new house, it may look amazing and new and exciting from the outside, but you won’t know how many cracks and flaws it has in its foundations until you’re months or years in and it’s too late. You will wish you had the house you knew back. You could’ve just given it a coat of paint and upgraded the kitchen and it would’ve been great! Everyone has issues and problems, you will have to go through with them in life, you cant just keep jumping from house to house hoping you’ll find one that doesn’t have flaws.

3. You THINK The Sex Will Be Better, But It Won’t Be

You think the sex will be better with someone else – anyone else – but the truth is, imagination is often far better than the real thing. First time sex is almost always awkward and unfulfilling. There’s nothing better than having sex with someone who knows you and loves you. If you want to have sex with a stranger, try role play – with your partner.

4. There are people out there that will kill for what you have

I know for a fact that there are many girls out there that would jump at the chance to have a shot with my man. In fact, when we got together and he started posting with me he lost about 200 female followers on Instagram 😂 (sorry babe). It’s so important to appreciate what you have and try to see your partner how other people do.

If you’re stuck in the relationship rut, or the 7 year itch (it exists!) it’s important you think it over thoroughly if you’re thinking about leaving. It’s normal for the passion to ebb and flow and it’s easy to lose sight of the amazing person you have when you’re with them all the time.

Don’t stop dating your partner, work together to keep the passion alive. If they are unwilling even after you tell them how you feel, maybe it is a sign it’s time to move on.

Bethany x

Want me to answer your love, sex and dating questions? Join My Facebook Group HERE

To get my articles straight to your inbox, sign up below (I never send you bullshit junk mail, promise!)

Success! You're on the list.

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: