Why Women Like Bad Boys

When you hear the term ‘Bad Boy’, do you imagine the Fonz from Happy Days in his leather jacket, smoking a cigarette and throwing a sly wink your way? ‘Ayyyyyyye!” Or maybe you imagine Jax, from Sons of Anarchy, dismounting his extremely shiny, dangerous motorcycle and sauntering over to you with a cheeky grin. He pushes you up against the brick wall, lightly grasps your neck and looks into your eyes with a burning intensity. Your breathing quickens as he runs a finger over your lips and leans down to whisper in your ear…… “I’m actually an accountant…” (what?! I had to cool it down somehow, I was getting carried away!)…

Seriously though, what is it about these types of men that cause us to make really dumb decisions and throw all reason out of the window, along with our panties? Personally, I don’t think it has anything to do with the ‘breaking-the-law’ part, or being a ‘heartbreaker’ part, I don’t even think it’s the leather jacket (who wears a leather jacket these days anyway?). It just boils down to the sexiness of extreme self confidence. Add to that the usually rugged appearance of a man who takes care of himself, drives us nuts. The muscles, the tattoos, the beard (ugh, the beard gets me every time). It’s everything that screams ‘I am a man, and I am going to do lots of strong things with my hands, and then I’m going to hold babies and animals with the same hands, using extreme gentleness that makes your ovaries ache”. Okay, maybe I went a bit too far there, but you know what I mean.

Women want a protector, a warrior. It’s built into our DNA. I’ve always said if a man can’t protect me from a zombie apocalypse – I don’t want him for a partner. Nuh-uh. As women we are looking for a safe place, even the most independent women still need the reassurance of a strong man behind her when shit gets tough. I know I do. I’m not saying he has to be as chiselled as the statue of David to be attractive, but if a man knows what he wants, does the work and leads the way – thats sexy.

The important distinction you have to make though, is the difference between a ‘Bad Boy’ and a ‘Run-For-The-Hills-This-Is-A-Bad-Idea Boy’. Because when we say ‘Bad Boy’, what we really mean is ‘Manly Man’. You don’t really want a member of a motorcycle gang that kills people and deals drugs do you? Look how that turned out for Tara…eek! Not sexy. Sometimes we choose toxic men because we have low self esteem and we think we deserve it. Sometimes we do it because it gives us a thrill of some kind, a dangerous addiction to drama. Don’t put yourself in a dangerous situation because you get excitement out of a man that’s just plain bad.

You can have a manly man that has all of the sexiness and bedroom prowess WITHOUT the cheating, gun fights and murder – promise! There are men out there that take control, take care of themselves, take risks, are exciting and confident AND are respectful to women (and some even have beards!) I know, because I found one. And even though I had to import him from New Zealand, he has shown me you can have the best of all worlds.

Bethany x

Photo by Hamid Tajik on Pexels.com

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